If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize