Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
