its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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