We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
