I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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