Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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