I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
