i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
