Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
