I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
