Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(925): View more from California

Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.

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(757): View more from Virginia

I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.

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(305): View more from Florida

i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot

(1-305): View more from Florida

lets call myth busters

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

Another sexterpiece awaits

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(770): View more from Georgia

I have to touch the horse lube. :-(

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