Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
