My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
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