brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I hate all girls vehemently.
this beer tastes like vomit already
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I love you. Go after that dick
Randomize
