Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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