yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
