She said her name was "party"
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
