what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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