I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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