I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
