I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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