She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
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