Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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