hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
