dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
