Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize