i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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