hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
