OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
