dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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