Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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