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is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
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