I never want to see another naked old woman again.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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