why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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