Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
