well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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