Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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