Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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