i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize