It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
