i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
