Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I think people are normalizing furries
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
