So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize