yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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