He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
