Pregnant stripper...not hot.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize