Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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