I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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