We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
My pussy is not your playground.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
