there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize