and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
