Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize
